The Reason I am in Missouri

So, with all of my frustration with graduate school lately I had to think back to why I came here in the first place. So, I thought a little reminder in writing would be good for me and some may not know this story in detail. It all started the summer of 2005, I had a feeling I needed to go and visit my friend, Alison, in Missouri. I honestly wasn't coming here to look at the program but it did cross my mind. So I spent a week here in MO with Alison and attended classes with her, went out to eat, down to the river to eat wonderful Thai food, etc. I relaxed and had a good time. While I was here Alison talked me in to meeting with the graduate dean and 2 other professors (both of whom are on my committee). While meeting with the dean she told me that she wanted me to come in August, as a side story I had just finished up teacher certification, taken my test and gotten a job and signed the contract the day before I traveled to MO. So, naturally I said no that I had obligations back in Texas and so she said then I want to see your application for next year on my desk in October (the whole meeting from hello to I want your application was 5 minutes) I told her that I wanted to pay down my student loans before I came back to school - she told me that they would be there when I got out! Anyway, I left MO and went back to TX not convinced that is what I should do.

Skip to October 2005 - one of my hellions in my class hit me about 10 times on the back of the head and gave me a concussion and sent me into a mandatory 2 week break. I did apply for school in Oct and got an acceptance for Jan (which I didn't apply for) in Nov; I wrote back and declined Jan but said yes to August because of the terrible experience I was having teaching. It was really bad! Soon after my return Dr. Hulme and I decided that I need to have surgery so in November I had surgery and was out for 2 weeks. Long story short the school district changed my contract to being like a sub, because I had used too many sick days (even though it was approved before hand), so now I was in a terrible classroom and was being paid terribly!

Skip to Jan 9th, 2008 - I got a paycheck and called HR trying to understand my new pay (because of the above mentioned change in contract that they did not tell me or my principal about) and they told me about what was going on. I left work incredibly frustrated with the whole thing and the situation in my classroom had just continued to go south so as I prayed that night I decided to email the dean and see if she still had funding for me for Jan, the semester started Jan 17th and it was getting really close. Little did I know that the dean sleeps with her computer (she is that attached) and emailed me back that night - I think around 11pm. So on the 10th I called and talked with her and she tried to see if I was going to have funding (I couldn't move without it) for the semester.

I have never had the Lords hand in my life so much and things fall into place so incredibly perfectly as they did that week. I quit my job (which officially I did not have a contract - remember) and packed my bags and drove to MO, found a place to live and moved in within 5 days. The next day I started work and classes and the rest is just a blur.

About two months after I got here I needed my temple recommend signed by the Stake President (who is also the institute director) so I went to institute (the one and only time here in MO) and then asked him to sign my recommend, which of course he was happy to do. Well, I had been feeling pretty overwhelmed by the sudden move, a yucky neighbor and Grandma's impeding death, so I asked for a blessing as well. It was incredible and said many wonderful things but something that really stuck out in my mind was that "there will be a time that you question why you are here and why the Lord has brought you to this place, know that it is the My will and that you will be blessed" it went on to talk about finishing my PhD and in the end knowing why the Lord had sent me here to work on my PhD here in MO. I have clung to that in the yucky times of my studies, the lonely times that I yearn to be closer to home and my times of wonder of why this place? I am very grateful for that blessing, the spirit and this place I call home for the next 3 months.