Talking/Typing

Since Friday I have had some stomach bug where frequent trips to the bathroom were very much a necessity, so not a terrible amount of other work has gotten done around here. Saturday I did manage to grade all my students papers and today I did my laundry, well it is waiting for me to fold - well technically still waiting in the dryer. So, what did I do with my day you ask between trips to the bathroom and feeling incredibly hungry but being scared to eat? Well, lucky for me Rob was sick too. No, I did not share this with him even though he tried to say I did - it is hard to share germs over the Internet. So, after I read my scriptures and turned on my Internet Rob popped up on skype - what a nice surprise, most days we don't get to talk until much later and I like "spending time" with him during the day so I was thrilled (it may not have come across that way seeing how I felt but I was).

So from 9:59 to 3:00 we talked. What do you talk about for that long? Well, life, love and happiness. Well, I really don't know so I looked back. We talked about my scripture reading, being sick (took the stage a lot since I was still running back and forth), my lovely students, cancelling class because of said bathroom problem, jobs, the future, houses, how much we want to spend on a house, marriage licenses, Shelly, my YW and the lesson yesterday, you get the idea. We talked and talked and I loved it. I need days like this from time to time and was grateful he wanted to talk with me too.

I was thinking about life a year ago - it was crazy - I was getting approval to do my dissertation research, doing interviews, taking 3 classes for my MPH program, started two internships and was working full-time. I had so much energy too - I guess you find the energy to do the things you need to do. Today - all I have is 2 classes, I teach 4 classes, trying to be motivated to finish my dissertation and plan a wedding. Why can't I get more done I wonder? I have so much less - well I have much less structure too. Never realized, well probably did but not to this extent, that I really need more structure in my life. This semester has been crazy and I keep thinking I will find my groove and figure stuff out - haven't yet. Barely keep up with my 120 students, two classes I am not fond of, and want to give up on my dissertation every day I sit down to work on it.

I am a list person - I write lists, I add to my lists the things I have already done so that I can mark them off, then I take great pleasure in marking things off. So, when I write on my list "write my dissertation" it just doesn't work - I have tried to break it down to "write up theme one" and well it doesn't help it still feel like there is a ton to do. Someday soon I will just write the darn thing and be done with my draft and give it to my lovely advisor to mark up and slaughter.

So back to talking - Rob and I talked again tonight - what about now you ask after all that during the day? Stuff - the kids, life, surgeries, money, birthday parties, we read Alma Ch 17 and talked about how gruesome the story of Ammon cutting off the arms is, etc. So, now I need to do better talking to other people too - my older sister said so and she is always right so I will try and do better. I am sorry if I am neglecting you.