Elder Scott's Book

I bought Elder Scott's book, Finding Peace, Happiness, and Joy about a year ago (I think). It has taken me forever to make it even as far as I have - I wish I had a good excuse but they are all bad really. I did however go back and read three of the chapters twice because like Elder Scott's talks his book is very spiritually meaty. I came across a paragraph that struck me today and I thought I would share it with you.

This life is an experience in profound trust --trust in Jesus Christ, trust in His teachings, and trust in our capacity, as led by the Holy Spirit, to obey those teachings to enjoy happiness now and to attain a purposeful, supremely happy eternal existence. To trust means to obey willingly without knowing the end form the beginning. To produce fruit, your trust in the Lord must be more powerful and enduring than your confidence in your own personal feelings and experience. (2007, p91).
I had never thought of this life as an experience about trust, just never put those words to it, I guess, but it makes perfect sense and is very profound. Just thought I'd share.

Motivation

I haven't been posting much because I have been unmotivated to do anything but the bare minimum of my life. I understand that is a lot but I expect more out of myself than that so this is a post to try and fix that situation. School is going great - I finally starting working on my proposal again and sent it to my adviser today. My new classes seem to be very interesting, my fellow students warm friendly and diverse and the expectations very doable! Thank goodness. I have a wonderful boss and job were I get great experience and opportunities to learn new things each day and for the first time in my life a job where I can study if I get everything done - so weird and wonderful all at the same time. I talked my new Bishop and HT into allowing me to keep my primary calling and having to keep my stake calling. Things seem to be going well but I am so tired and right now sick (a very yucky cold) that I don't have much motivation to do anything but keep up. So, I am making sure that changes - I am not sure how because I have to blow my nose every 2 or 3 minutes but I will have more energy and be healthier soon!!!
I was talking with a colleague yesterday about how I got my job and as I told her the story I was happy to be able to talk to her about praying for guidance and help in finding and getting a job and her reaction of yeah, it really helps. I am so grateful for good, whole some people that I get to work with, around, etc. I feel very blessed. In October Heather, Issac, Hannah, Kim and I went through a corn maze, I blogged about it then, this was one of the pictures I took. We were standing on a metal bridge trying to figure out what to do next, specifically because we were looking for certain questions to answer. Every time that this picture flashes across my screen on my computer I think about how much that is like each one of us sometimes. We climb high trying to figure out what to do next because we have questions we need answered when all we really have to do is raise our voice up to HF and then listen. Shelly has been in CA getting Arabella this last week and she has talked about how strong she is and what a fighter she is - I hope that as HF looks down that she can think that of me (probably not always but at least sometimes) a fighter for the right, for good, for families, for a strong country, for the gospel.

First Week and Half of My New Job

I started my new job on Jan7th and it is going really well. I have done 5 interviews in the last week and have 3 scheduled for next week. We are doing training and meeting with all of the key players in the next week or so. It seems to be going well. I have the most wonderful boss ever and love the nursing school environment. I need to make some friends because it is kinda lonely by myself in my office. I am so very grateful for this job, the opportunity and connections that I am making as I work. Friday morning I had run out of projects to work on and so decided to study for my classes next week. My boss came in and I told her that I didn't have enough to do so she gave me a few more projects which I got done quickly and the next time I saw her and gave my report on things she said "I thought this might be a problem" and so of course I ask "what?" and she said "keeping you busy enough". I thought it was funny, but I am not one that can take forever to do something simple so I think that it will be the perfect job while going to school - I can work on my school work, etc and finish up everything that is asked of me without any problem. What a wonderful blessing!
On Wed. my home teachers came over (now my bishop and his son) and it was really funny as I lobbied (this was his word) to keep my calling as he listened to all I have to do. I didn't mention that I have to do a internship that goes on forever, about a year in all because I have to put in 360 hours by the end. I am hoping to do that at the Boone Co. Health Department. My boss said oh yeah! - I know that person I will tell her that you are going to call and get the process going. So, that should be easy to get. I am grateful yet again that the Lord is in charge of my life and not me - I am limited by my very human mind and abilities.

I am an Aunt Again!

Well, technically Arabella Michele Hope Turpin is 2 months, 1 week and 2 days old but Shelly and Jason finally found out officially last night that they will be her parents. She is really cute and looks so much like Joy that she could be her biological sister. Shelly and Jason are leaving tonight to go and get her from CA. Things are working out very nicely and little Arabella will be another joy and blessing in their family! Congratulations!

Joy in the Gospel

Alma 17:2
...Alma did rejoice exceedingly to see his brethern; and what added more to his joy, they were still his brethern in the Lord; yea, and they had waxed strong in the knowledge of the truth; for they were men of sound understanding and they had searched the scriptures diligently, that they might know the word of God.

Yesterday I found out that an old roommate of mine and Cyndi's, Melissa, had fallen away from the church. She contacted me on facebook and I followed the URL provided for her blog and was so saddened to see that she was no longer a practicing member. Melissa came home from her mission to England early because she was diagnosed with thyroid cancer. She went through chemo and all of that and had surgery to remove her thyroid and was doing well when we lived together. She graduated at that time and went to Colorado where Cyndi, Alexa and I went to visit. She was a good Mormon girl and we had great conversations. How sad I was when I saw her wedding dress was spaghetti straps and very low cute with a glass of champagne in her hand. Then I kept reading and was more and more saddened. I think that there are a lot of reasons that I reacted so strongly to her falling away - one of which may be the many comparisons we held in our lives. I really was ready to cry that she was no longer my sister in the Lord. I had always thought I understood that scripture but yesterday the meaning was so much more firmly planted. I know that we all make choices and that those choices can be eternal but I hope and pray that she decides to come back to the church and the fellowship of the saints.
All of this has made me think of how very important it is to stay connected to those we love and try hard to truly understand and support the things that they are doing in their lives. It seems that the individuals that fall away have also not found the support, love and connection that they need in the church which is where we all come in. My testimony of having the three things that President Hinckley always talked about: a calling, a friend and being nourished by the good word of God are so vital to sustaining and building on a firm foundation for our testimony.
My sweet bishop was released today and with tears streaming down his face thanked all of us for serving and sustaining each other. I am grateful for that man that taught us so much about service and love through his actions and made us want to serve and sustain him. What a great leader!

Random Thoughts for the Week

The past few weeks have been very challenging for me physically and emotionally. When I got home for Christmas I was able to see how much my mama's condition was affecting her and that was hard to see and deal with emotionally because Mama has always been healthy and strong and she wasn't able to do much and then physically taxing to get everything ready for everyone. By the way I won't be wrapping presents for a long time! I told Mama right after Cyndi left on Sunday that I wanted to take it really easy the next week and as most of you know Grannie collapsed the very next day and Mama left the next day. The next week felt like a month - not so much because of the kids but because emotionally it was so hard and then so hard to be away from what was happening, not say good-bye or attend the funeral. I was so grateful that I was able to stay and watch the kids for Mama and help them have some normalcy, this was the first time that they were apart from both parents for any length of time and I think the first time they have been away from Mama for more than a few days. They were scared and showed it in normal 5 and 7 year old ways like being whiny, fighting, attaching themselves physically to my side, etc. and I was trying hard to be patient and loving (I need some work in this area when I am stressed, tired, not feeling well, worried about someone dying and those left behind, and being so sad myself).
This weeks hasn't been much better. I left on Tuesday and the Lord blessed me to get home relatively quickly with an additional stop in OK. But I came home very tired and started my job the next day and so I got to bed as soon as possible and then woke up and went to work the next day. Each night I had things I had to accomplish (like unpacking, putting Christmas up, etc.) and would fall into bed around 11 and then get up again. Friday we worked on the Primary activity and then Saturday we were at the church at 8am setting up for it. It turned out great and we had over 80 kids and then the teachers, parents, leaders, etc. We ate a whole lot of little smokies and cinnamon rolls.
With all of that I have been so blessed. The Lord has blessed my body to be strong, to get good sleep (this usually doesn't happen), to be able to just continue and I am so grateful.
While I was driving home I was listening to parts of the last GC on CD and got thinking about that talk by Elder Bednar a few years ago about the Lord's Tender Mercies (I think it was Oct 2006) and all the little mercies I had seen in such a short period of time. The Sunday that I got home we had a family fast for Mama that she would be able to feel better and participate in daily life and the Christmas celebrations. That day she started to feel better and that has been sustained throughout Grannie's hospitlization and death - I am so very grateful to the Lord for this great blessing! Other mercies like a great boss that allowed me to stay and take care of the kids and start my job later than planned, an incredible amount of peace and love felt during the time while Mama was gone, the power of the hymns and primary songs as the kids and I sang to make us less sad, the power of prayer that we can ask and be blessed with comfort, a wonderful family that pulls together in crisis, the list goes on and on and I feel so blessed.

Aurora's 1st Birthday at the Zoo

We celebrated Aurora's first birthday today - it was a fun day.  Nathan, Mandy and I left the house at 9:15 and drove to Shelly's to caravan to the zoo.  We got there and had a yummy lunch, blew out the candles on a cupcake, and then went to the zoo.  Donna ended up with all the boys (David, Nathan and Cameron) and Victoria and then all the girls and Jason went another way.  We meet up in the children's area.  We all had a fun time and got great snack bags with animal shaped cups for everyone and cotton candy - the kids had a great time with that!  Thanks Asia for a fun filled day!

The kid table

The baby line up and Katherine

Aurora with her birthday cupcake - I think she liked it.

Sweet cousins - Katherine and Lizzy

Beth decided that as we passed the bushes shaped as animals that we needed to act out the animal - this was a bear or tiger or something!

In the reptile house there is a tube you can climb through - our girls thought it was great!

Mandy in front of the giraffes

We took a break to eat our cotton candy and snacks and found this cool pond.

Our beautiful prairie dogs - Katherine, Jessi, and Mandy

Glowie Mae Pickard Belcher

Grannie as we know her is in a better place since she passed away this morning.  I have been staying with Mandy and Nathan and have had tons of questions about where heaven is (20 miles away, 10 miles away, Mandy thought a bizillion), how we know that there is heaven, how Jesus knows to talk to us when we get to heaven and on and on.  I have tried my best to answer all of these questions and sometimes just to understand what on earth is being asked.  We have prayed and prayed and prayed for Pepa that he will not have a sad heart and that he will be able to cope better with the anguish he is experiencing. 

I was never as close to Grannie as I was to Grandma, very different relationships, but because this was all so sudden I have had a harder time dealing with it and because I am not going to the funeral and never really got to say goodbye closure is harder. 

I love Grannie and Pepa and am glad for all the things that she did to raise Mama even if I didn't agree with the way she did some things because it made Mama the person I love.  I am so glad that she found Pepa and was able to live the rest of her life in her "happily ever after".  I had the chance to talk with her as an adult some and one conversation sticks out the most.  We were talking about marriage (probably 5 years ago) and she was asking me if there had been any opportunities for me.  I said yes but that there had been reasons that I had chosen to say no and as we talked about that she told me that she was proud of me for making those choices and that she had not thought things through and only gone with her heart and that had gotten her in trouble.  Then she said something that Grandma always used to say "God has picked out someone special for you so just wait".  Of course that is true for everyone but it was nice to have her understand where I was coming from.

I love her and will miss her and hope with all my might that Pepa can overcome his grief and feel the peace of the Lord.

Bowling in Tomball

On the News Year Eve day we decided to distract ourselves from worrying about Mama and Grannie and went bowling with the kids.  We had two teams the Ball/Lowes and the Turpins.  There was a high scorer in both teams - Sammi for team Turpin with 91 and Nathan for team Ball/Lowe with 93.  Sadly enough the kids beat all of the adults!

a whole gaggle of girls and Nathan

Mandy in action

Asia bowling, holding a baby and talking to Ben on the phone

Aurora trying her hand at bowling - she did get some of the pins down!